


How We Glitter and Fade

by stardropdream



Category: X/1999
Genre: F/M, Incest, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-24
Updated: 2013-02-24
Packaged: 2017-12-03 10:48:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/697446
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stardropdream/pseuds/stardropdream
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Her wish lingers, so she lingers."</p>
            </blockquote>





	How We Glitter and Fade

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on LJ July 14, 2012. 
> 
> Forever and ever ago I saw a prompt on the CLAMP kink meme that was essentially "Kotori and Fuuma's first time on a beach." SO THEN THIS HAPPENED? Yes.

The dreamscape shimmers, uncertain. From the distance, he approaches the two figures.   
  
“What is it?” he asks, as if he doesn’t already know.  
  
Her image flickers, incomplete and fleeting. Kakyou looks away, not able to meet her fully in the eye, and unable to meet his, as well. The dream around them holds still, as if clinging to something uncertain. Fleeting. The wind shifts, just a moment – if it truly is a wind at all.   
  
“Since her wish lingers, she lingers. But…” his voice wavers for just a moment, weighed down with the past. Voice weak. “But she is indistinct.”   
  
She’s smiling at him, though. It would almost be as the times that were long gone, although she is different even as she smiles. Sad eyes, quiet. Her image flickers. “Onii-chan…”  
  
He nods his head, glancing between her and Kakyou. The dark spread of ripples and feathers shifts, lurches as if from night to day. The ground sinks under their weight, morphs, becomes sand.   
  
Kotori looks out over the ocean, wind pushing her hair back from her face, revealing each line and slope. Kakyou looks at her one last time before he begins to shard, breaking apart and disappearing.  
  
“I’m not part of this wish,” his voice says, fading, echoing against the ocean rock.   
  
“Onii-chan,” she says again, quietly, looking up at him – turning her eyes away from the waters around them.  
  
“There’s something you want,” he says, watching the flickering after-image of the girl who was once ‘Fuuma’s’ sister.   
  
She smiles and nods. Then she sits down. He joins her, because that is her wish.  
  
“I just wanted to see you one last time,” she says.   
  
“And what of ‘Kamui’?”   
  
Her eyes lower and she smiles sadly. “I want to see him, too. But it’s too much… And it’d be too much for him, too.” She flickers, begins to blur, like static. “Perhaps it’s selfish of me… I know that I have to leave – and yet, I—”  
  
She crackles, becomes impossible to distinguish from the landscape, impossible to see beyond the particles of sand. And then she is back again, in painful focus.   
  
“It’s cruel of me… I spare him, but not you.”  
  
“It is your wish,” is all he says.   
  
She smiles. It reaches her eyes, a gentle expression. “Yes… you’re right.” She looks away. “My wish… I have many.”  
  
“Yes,” he agrees.  
  
“Some are impossible to grant. Even for you, onii-chan.”  
  
“Yes,” he agrees.  
  
She tucks hair behind her ear. “Truthfully, I’m afraid of what’s beyond… I know that I’m already there. But this part of me that lingers is very afraid.”  
  
She flickers again, a candle. She’s looking out at the water.  
  
“Will I be like Mother? A mermaid?” She looks down. “Or is there… nothing? Is this it?”   
  
He meets her gaze, but says nothing.  
  
“I don’t know what possibility scares me more.” She closes her eyes, smiling, leaning her head down upon his shoulder. He lets her. “Even so, I don’t regret doing it. But… it’s still frightening.”  
  
He touches the top of her head, and her smile softens.  
  
“Like old times,” she says, wistful, because they both know those times won’t return. She flickers out of existence for one moment before she is there again, rooted down. It’s a strange moment – touching air and then touching solid again.   
  
“Your lingering fear is what keeps you here. The rest of your ‘soul’ has moved on. But you remain.” He closes his eyes. “ Because you have a wish that keeps you here.”  
  
“Onii-chan…” she begins.  
  
“So I will grant it,” he says, and she lurches in place, static and feedback, flickering in and out, her eyes wide and hopeful.  
  
“The wish I want the most is one I know I can’t have,” she says, voice soft and far away. “To live again with onii-chan and Kamui-chan… for the three of us to be happy.” She wipes her face, brushing aside the tears that are falling. “I’m sorry—even after I wish to shatter instead, I—”  
  
“Wishes are selfish,” he says, pulling away from her so he can touch her face. “It is a wish I can’t grant.”  
  
“I know,” she whispers. She covers his hand with her own. She smiles a watery smile. “Even if you could, I wouldn’t want you to… to bear those consequences alone for granting it. The repercussions that emerge as a result of granting wishes.”  
  
He inclines his head.  
  
She sniffles, her hand pressing against his. “All I can hope for now is that you and Kamui-chan can find happiness. Even if it’s a selfish wish.”  
  
She pulls his hand back, kissing the palm of his hand, lingering, a few stray teardrops falling onto his hand. He lets her.  
  
“All wishes are selfish,” he says again. “It’s the nature of all things.”  
  
“Yes…” she says, shifting, uneasy. She closes her eyes, flickering in and out of view. She seems to glow only to fade more, a distant, dying star.   
  
He touches her cheek again, draws her to him. Kisses her. Feels her kiss back – sigh out a quiet wish. She exhales, quiet, broken, continues to flicker in and out. She holds tight to him.  
  
“Will I have to leave when this ends?” she whispers against his mouth.  
  
He pushes her hair back from her face, a shadow of times that could never return.  
  
“Yes.”  
  
She closes her eyes. “Mm… alright.”  
  
And then she wraps her arms around him, draws him near, and kisses him like she is drowning – kisses him because this is the last. She is the remainder, and she is fading.  
  
He holds her, gently, for that is her wish. She is static in his arms – there one moment and gone the next. But she returns, a broken record caught skipping. She kisses him, deep and confining, and he cups her cheek, lets her tongue dart shyly into his mouth, lets her understand for the first and last time.   
  
When he pulls away from her she seems to fragment, little bird bones shattering from too much pressure. But then she is there again, fingers in his hair, pulling away his glasses with shaking fingers.  
  
“This is what you want?” he asks.  
  
“Please,” she whispers, her voice echoing against the rocks.  
  
He closes his eyes, draws her close, kisses her, opens his mouth and kisses her deeply, pulling her under. The cheerful summer day the dream depicts drifts away and becomes night, the sky full of known and unknown stars.  
  
She pulls off his shirt, leans back into the cooling sand and pulls him on top of her, her cheeks a deep red.  
  
She pulls him down, kisses him again, hands sliding over his chest. His hand fists in the folds of her dress, hitching it up her leg, letting it pool at her hip. His fingers splay slowly over her naked thigh, and she breathes out, quiet, arms curling around him and tugging close, flickering in and out beneath him. Her hands find his hair, holds tight, before loosening – unsure what to hold on to. They slip over his shoulders, down his back. They move to his front, tug at his belt. He lets her.  
  
She pulls the belt out, and sits up, fiddling with the buttons of the front of her dress, her fingers shaking. When she loosens it enough, she pulls it up over her head, letting her hair tumble down over her shoulders and down her back, stray strands falling sweetly over her face. He brushes them aside.  
  
She sighs out, leans into his touch. She closes her eyes and smiles. And she flickers like static and disappears completely for five seconds, his hand touching only air. But she returns just as suddenly, her cheeks pink, lips slightly parted. She leans back again, hair fanning out beneath her and pulling him down over her, their bodies pressing together.  
  
Her leg curls around his hip, tethers him there as she tips her head up and kisses him. She pillows her lips against his, feather-light kisses peppering his lips, his chin, and up his jaw. He stays still, eyes closing. She shivers beneath him as he slides his hands over her sides, teasing at her bra, cupping her hip, tugging at the elastic of her underwear.   
  
She lifts her hips as he pulls it down. Her hands shake against his pants, undoing them enough to get them down over his hips. Shyly, biting at her lip, she reaches out so her fingers can brush against him. He shifts his hips up into her touch and, feeling bolder, she curls her hand around him.  
  
He reaches out, undoes the snap of her bra, leans down and kisses at her collarbone, at the swell of her breasts.  
  
“Onii-chan,” she murmurs quietly, lifting her hand away as her legs wrap around his hips, puling themselves together. She gasps quietly at the contact, her body slick against him.  
  
He kisses at her throat, hand rising to curl into her hair and hold fast. She shifts under him, breathes out, seems almost solid, and he responds to the silent request her tightening legs ask. He shifts, pulls her over on top of him as he leans back onto his back, her knees sinking into the sand as she straddles him, naked and eyes wide.  
  
He rocks up against her and she bites her lip, breath hitching in a slight gasp. Then she rocks her hips forward to meet him, their bodies pressing against the other. He slides his hand between them, hooks one finger up and into her. She arches her back, clenching her eyes shut in surprise by the sudden intrusion. She relaxes quickly enough, though, rolling her hips down as he moves his finger slowly in and out. She moves in time to his movements.   
  
Soon a second finger joins the first, pushing slowly into her arching body. She whimpers just a little. Then she begins to move, writhing against his hand.  
  
“Please,” she whispers, voice quiet.   
  
He pulls his hand away, sucks on his fingers as he moves her with his other hand, cups her waist and pulls her, slumping up to slip into her. He keeps his movements slow, waiting until she relaxes before moving more. Both hands move to cup her hips, thumbs stroking smooth tempos against her skin.  
  
She leans down, resting her hands on his chest, then moving her hips down to take all of him into her small body. She pants out, ducking her head. Hair spills over her shoulder, shadowing her face and pooling against his stomach.  
  
They move. He jerks his hips up and she snaps her down to meet him. They move to this pace, a steady beat punctuated by her soft gasps when he hits deep inside her. Her heart is beating quickly, a fluttering bird heart that could burst at any moment.   
  
His hands guide her, but she’s the one to set the pace, moving above him, moving her hips up and down, hair falling over her body in waves. She flickers like static.  
  
He pushes in and out and after a moment he slips his hand back between them, thumb circling against her clit, his other hand holding a small breast and squeezing, brushing aside her hair. She seems to melt against him, static and feedback, a lost radio wave. She gasps and it echoes off the oblique corners of the dream.  
  
A few more snaps of her hips and a few strokes of his thumb, and she comes with a quiet moan, tensing up into an arch before slowly sinking down, greeting him with a quiet kiss. He holds her for a moment, touches her cheek and kisses her back.  
  
He feels her fading against him, just as he knew she would. The unknown stars above them flicker in and out, matching her finality.   
  
“Onii-chan,” she whispers against his mouth, touches his face. She pulls away, smiling but with tears in her eyes. “I wish I could stay.”  
  
“I know,” he says, lets her fingers trace the curve of his cheeks.   
  
“But you can’t grant that wish,” she says.  
  
“No.”  
  
“Mm,” she hums, eyelids lowering as she looks down, sad and fading – but hopeful. She kisses his forehead. “It’s alright… I’m happy.”   
  
He’s quiet. She’s nothing more than a shadow now, the color gone from her hair and eyes.   
  
“Goodbye,” she whispers.  
  
He closes his eyes. When he opens them again, it is daylight and the dream is over.


End file.
